PicoBlog

I perfected the art of eating a Rise ‘n Roll donut laden with cinnamon powdered sugar while driving a car. In the early to mid-2000s, I would get a fresh Rise ‘n Roll donut at its original location and eat it in six bites as I drove. I learned how not to end up covered in powder as I bit and chewed. That bakery, which opened in 2004, sold yeast donuts that were made by rolling out a slab of dough and hand-cutting them.

Note— I wrote this article on October 24th for an international news media brand after an editor reached out asking for me to write a call to queer people to be in solidarity with Palestine. After receiving backlash for publishing their Pro-Palestinian pieces, the magazine decided that they weren’t going to publish the piece. After publishing their pro-Palestinian stance the magazine lost over seven figures of funding and had to hire a Crisis PR Media team due to threats that they were facing for their stance.

You learn the alphabet as a small child through rote memorization: Start with A, go through the string until you get to Z, and sing it to the tune of “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.” Voila! That’s the alphabet. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z The problem is most of those letters are in the wrong place.

I was talking with my father over dinner just the other night. He was reminiscing with me about when I was about fourteen months old and I was pretty badly injured in our (then) kitchen. We lived in La Jolla, California and I was just finding my feet, literally, in that I was beginning my lumbering, drunken journey towards becoming bipedal. Apparently I was at my mother’s side in the kitchen and I was able to find my way to a freshly brewed batch of coffee.

I’ve been thinking about the Mandela Effect — or something close to it, I’m not a scientist so don’t get mad at me — when it comes to childhood television shows.  The actual phenomenon refers to shared memories we all have about some things that are just plain false, coined after researcher Fiona Broome admitted that she thought Nelson Mandela (who died in 2013) died in prison in the 1980s and learned that she wasn’t alone in misremembering.

No one listens like Oprah. I have always found her incredibly fascinating, but none more so than when she sits opposite a celebrity for an interview. This isn’t to say that she’s not a great interviewer of ordinary everyday humans, but there’s something about how she manages to disarms celebrities who burn just as brightly as she does. How they feel comfortable opening up to her. It’s been a minute since she’s dropped some fresh interview game on us, which is why Sunday’s interview with Harry and Meghan felt so monumentous.

America Ferrera’s speech in Barbie about how “it is literally impossible to be a woman” is being heralded as the most important feminist monologue of our time. Take a look. Now try it this way. It is literally impossible to be a man. You are so strong and so capable, and it kills me that you don’t think you’re good enough. Like, we always have to be extraordinary, but somehow we’re always doing it wrong.

The steady hum of commuter traffic from Ellsworth and inland Hancock County to Mount Desert Island and Acadia National Park was enough to bore any motorist travelling on Route 3 through Trenton, Maine. But my Subaru’s funky noise kept me on edge. That, plus, I was heading to work with a boss who liked to invite me on dates and change the words to songs like “Pop Goes the Weasel” to feature me.

Hello Hayes, I’ve had a friend who, over the years, has become one of the most important people in my life. We’ve never once either considered each other in a romantic sense. We live a couple hours away from each other but he comes here at least once a month — and sometimes more — just to spend time together. Well, about a month ago, he came down for my birthday and one thing led to another and we slept together.